Gathered from offices, hotels, shops and roadsides, this collection of seemingly ridiculous signs offers such examples as: "e;Elephants please stay in your car"e;; "e;If you cannot read this, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons"e;; and "e;Bargain basement upstairs"e;, as well as - On a cruise ship: Please do not lean on the widow. In a hotel: A sports jacket ...