How Not to Raise a Perfect Child

A perfect child:* Dresses neatly and practises the violin before breakfast* Comes top of the class and is captain of everything* Is unfailingly obedient and sweet-tempered* Is a perfect credit to its perfect motherA real child:* Prefers shoelaces undone and mismatched socks* Shouts 'Bum!' at Granny* Turns breakfast and bedtime into a battleground* Is the normal offspring of imperfect parentsWith a...