Abraham Lincoln
A Legacy of Fun
Published by Good Press, 2022
goodpress@okpublishing.info
EAN 4064066198596
Table of Contents
MEMOIR.
ABE LINCOLN, THE GREAT AMERICAN JESTER.
Lincoln and Meagher.
Hooker’s Appointment.
Cut Cavendish.
Commodore Wilks.
A proper Cognomen.
A Princely Pun.
A Severe Retort.
Conundrum.
A Grumbler Answered.
Loquacity.
A Slashing Inuendo.
Scriptural Criticism.
A Poultry (paltry) War.
Lincoln on Physic.
False Accusation.
How to make Foes.
Tough Job.
The only alternative.
Abe’s Difficulties.
Misnomers.
Deficiency of Fuel.
A Queer Compliment.
A slight addition.
Preaching out West.
Tom Thumb.
How a Black’s Made.
Abe’s First Joke.
A Wonderful Child.
How to stop thieves.
Hopping the twig.
The best saddles.
An offer rejected.
A decided smasher.
Artillery Practice.
A curious addition.
The Cost of War.
In memory of.
A Crocodile’s age.
No Thanks.
Merry-Making.
A Husband’s Wit.
The cause discovered.
Byronic.
A satisfactory conclusion.
A mother’s alarm.
Punning again.
Idol.
A Word for the Irish.
Skill of a Young Officer.
A foot in it.
Lincoln to Ewell ,
Shakspearian Query.
Running Comment.
An Impossibility.
Jack’s Opinion.
The House of Congress.
Abe Lincoln’s opinion of a man’s strength.
The Fall of Pride.
The Captain’s Reply.
A Strange Similarity.
Economy.
Where Punch got his Cartoon from.
Pun upon Pun.
Lincoln at the Play.
A Ludicrous Mistake.
A Southern Estimate.
Strong Habits.
How to Fight.
A Majority Wanted.
A Story concerning a Second Term.
Estimate of Official Honours.
Truly Awful.
Presidential Puns.
A Liberal Giver.
Coffee versus Tea.
Lincoln on Skedaddle.
Miraculous.
Liquor, Boys.
Seasonable.
Too Deep.
How to Conquer the South.
Gratuitous Kindness.
Blowing Hot and Cold.
Negro Pluck.
Hirsute Philosophy.
Slander.
Change of Climate.
Cruel News.
Lincoln’s opinion of Mr. Curtain.
A new Motive Power.
Southern Hills versus Northern Banks.
The President and the Pleader.
Waterproof.
Concerning Congress Men.
Inquisitiveness Nonplussed.
The Judge and his Coachman.
Concerning the President Personally.
The President’s Vanity.
Tremendous answer.
Two instances where the President was not reminded of a story.
Public Opinion.
The President’s Secret.
About the Negro Question.
An extraordinary reply by Old Abe.
A Rebuke to people asking trivial questions.
A Liar.
Strong Pills.
A Sharp Rejoinder.
Wisdom at a Discount.
Pickles!
A Conundrum.
Over Early v. over late.
The Poet and the President.
Matrimony.
Abe and the Picture Dealer.
A Pun.
Sojourner Truth.
The National Debt.
Falsely Telegraphed.
The Sword and the Law.
Pepper v. Laurels.
Abe at the Play.
Abe and the Officer.
Anecdote.
The Scotch Editor.
The Senator.
Common Sense.
The Epitaph.
A Metaphor.
WORKS PUBLISHED BY FARRAH,
MEMOIR.
Table of Contents
Abe Lincoln, the late President of the United States of America, was born on the 12th of February, 1809, in Hardin County, in the State of Kentucky. His grandfather, who emigrated from Virginia to the above State, was slain by the Indians in 1784. Thomas Lincoln, father of the President, and Nancy Hawks, his mother, were natives of Virginia. The opportunities for education enjoyed by Abraham were few and far between, for at an early age his father needed his assistance in clearing the forest, and making it a fitting dwelling place for man. Still, whenever an opportunity presented itself, it was eagerly grasped, and the result was that, despite of untoward circumstances, Abraham succeeded in acquiring a decent knowledge of his mother tongue and the rudiments of an ordinary education.
“At nineteen,” says one of his biographers, “we find him serving as a common bargeman on a boat plying to New Orleans. In March, 1830, he accompanied his father to Macon County, Illinois, and helped him to build a log cabin for the family home, and he made enough rails to fence in ten acres of land. The next year he was employed as a boat builder to assist in building a flat-bottomed boat, which he afterwards took to New Orleans, and upon his return his employer put him in charge of a store in Illinois.
“In 1832, when the ‘Black Hawk War’ broke out, he joined a company of Volunteer Rifles; and such was his popularity that he was almost immediately unanimously chosen captain by his comrades—an unexpected piece of good fortune which he often said gave him greater pleasure than any subsequent success in life. Here he served for three months only, when he was proposed as a candidate for the Legislature of Illinois, but his opponents being in a majority he was defeated. Soon after this he was appointed post-master of New Salem; and now, having a little leisure time on his hands, he began to study law, borrowing of an evening books from a neighbouring lawyer, and returning them the next morning.
“A survey of Sangamon County was ordered by the Government about this time, and the surveyor offered to depute Mr. Lincoln to survey that portion of the work lying in his part of the county. Nothing daunted, he procured a treatise on surveying, and after reading it, purchased a compass and chain, and did the work.
“In 1834 he was elected member of the Legislature of Illinois by a large majority, and was re-elected in 1836, 1838, and 1840. In 1836 he obtained a licence to practice law, and he removed to Springfield, where he entered into partnership with a Mr. Stuart, and rose rapidly in public favour, being very successful as an advocate in jury trials.