A Country of Couch Potatoes

It’s obvious that today’s generations are lazier than those of the past. Perhaps this is because so many modern conveniences allow us to be lazy. For example, America has become a drive-through nation. Without ever leaving the comfort of your car, you can:

• Apply for a loan.

• Buy beer and cigarettes, groceries, or lottery tickets.

• Do your banking.

• Donate to charity.

• Drop off and pick up your dry cleaning.

• Eat.

• Get flu shots.

• Get married.

• Get photographs developed.

• Have your car washed.

• Have your oil changed.

• Have your prescriptions filled.

• Mail a letter.

• Pawn your extra stuff.

• Pay your respects to the recently departed at the drive-through viewing window of a funeral home.

• Place a bet in a casino.

• View art at a drive-through art gallery.

• Watch a movie at a drive-in theatre.

For those who find getting in the car and leaving the house too much work, we have the Internet. Without leaving the comfort of your home you can:

• Apply for a job, a car loan, a credit card, or a home mortgage

• Adopt a child (at least partially).

• Balance your checking account.

• Book an airline ticket, a cruise, or a hotel room.

• Buy CDs or DVDs, a cellular telephone, groceries, guns, movie tickets, or tickets to concerts or ballgames.

• Buy or sell stocks or shares in mutual funds.

• Buy other people’s extra stuff.

• Chat online with friends, business associates, and family members (who are in the next room).

• Commit crimes.

• Consult with a doctor, a financial advisor, a lawyer, a pastor, or a psychiatrist.

• Custom configure a computer, have it built and delivered the same week.

• Do all your Christmas shopping and have presents delivered to your doorstep prewrapped.

• Do research for business or homework.

• Donate to charity.

• Hire a groomer to come to your house and groom your dog.

• Hire a dog sitter to feed and walk your dog.

• Hire a trainer to train your dog.

• Hire someone to clean your house.

• Arrange for a massage or yoga lesson.

• Hire someone to wash your car or change the oil.

• Hire someone to mow your lawn or spray for weeds.

• Hire someone to clean your chimney or air conditioning ducts.

• Get a college degree.

• Get divorced.

• Get photographs developed or prescriptions filled.

• Open a checking account or an IRA.

• Order clothes and exchange those that don’t fit.

• Order flowers, pizza, wine, or groceries and have them delivered.

• Pay for and print postage labels for a package the mail carrier will pick up at your door.

• Pay your bills or taxes.

• Place a bet in a casino.

• Read a book or newspaper.

• Rent a DVD and have it delivered.

• Sell your old car or other stuff.

• Shop for and buy a new car or a house.

• Start a business.

• View art galleries.

• Watch movies.

• Take a virtual tour through a museum.

• Watch your kids in day care.

You can’t buy lotto tickets online yet, but the Virginia Lottery allows state residents to purchase them by mail. If getting up off the sofa and walking to the computer requires too much effort, there’s wireless Internet access (WiFi). You can surf the Web on your laptop computer using WiFi and never leave the sofa. I feel like such a dinosaur now explaining to kids how we didn’t have remote controls for television sets in the old days. I knew not to go near the television when Dad was watching because I’d have to stand there and change channels. We thought the remote control was the greatest invention since air conditioning. Then doctors became concerned that remote controls made it too easy for people to watch television and never leave the sofa. Little could they have predicted where the Internet would take us. Now people can buy a new television set without leaving the sofa.

A seminar attendee in Kansas City, Missouri, had a conversation that revealed how lazy technology has allowed us to become. Her 12-year-old son didn’t want to make the trip to Sedona, Arizona, to visit his grandmother. He argued, “Why do we have to go visit? We have free long distance and can talk to her any time we want.” He had a good point. Just a few years ago, long distance service cost 35 cents a minute. Talking to Grandma out of state was a big deal. Now we can talk free on nights and weekends to friends or loved ones anywhere in the country. When the woman explained she wanted to see Grandma instead of just talk to her, he suggested buying a web-cam for his computer and one for Grandma. In the 1995 movie Copycat, Sigourney Weaver portrayed a forensic psychologist who became agoraphobic and never left her home. It seemed freakish and bizarre at the time; now it almost seems normal.

Why would anyone ever need to leave home today? The answer is to go to work. With all these modern conveniences, work is inconvenient. It’s no wonder that so many Americans find it an imposition to drag out of bed and commute to work every day. If the tough get going when the going gets tough, what happens when the going gets too easy? As managers know, people can grow fat and lazy. Living in the land of milk and honey doesn’t require much effort. It does, however, require self-discipline, or the milk and honey will start to show around our waistlines. We don’t need to look far to see this is exactly what’s happening in the United States today—both figuratively and literally.

Too Many Castles, Too Few Kings

In 1985, I was a senior studying industrial management at Georgia Tech in Atlanta. An economics professor said, “I don’t know how your generation will ever afford to buy a home with interest rates so high.” I graduated and bought my first home in Nashville, Tennessee, the next year. I paid $37,000 for a two-bedroom condominium and financed it at 11 percent. The monthly payment was the same as rent on my old apartment, and I couldn’t understand his gripe. The mortgage rates fell below 5 percent 20 years later. I now live in a four-bedroom house I bought later that same year. It’s modest, but meets my needs just fine. Yet, I sometimes find myself doing the math to see how much more I could have purchased if the interest rate was 5 percent back then. I’m grateful the interest rates were so high. Had they been as low as they are today, I might have been tempted to take on more debt than I should have. The Federal Housing Finance Board reported that the national average one-family-house purchase price in November 2004 was over $264,000.¹ Today’s 40-year-low interest rates have allowed people to buy houses their parents would never have dreamed of buying. Some of these homes are very luxurious; they’re like castles with granite countertops, marble floors, bidets, jacuzzi bathtubs, crown molding, and vaulted ceilings. Add two $40,000 SUVs in a heated and air-conditioned garage and today’s average Joe is living like yesterday’s Joe Millionaire.

So what’s the problem with living in a castle? Kings and queens live in castles. When the average Joe lives in a castle, it’s easy for him to develop a false sense of accomplishment. Why would anyone want to drag out of bed and leave a warm castle for a cold factory? Every woman wants to be a queen, and every man wants to be a king. We are neither when we go to work; we are servants for hire. Contrast this to the guy who lives in a roach-infested apartment that is cold and dank in the winter. There’s no air-conditioning and it’s sweltering in the summer. He looks forward to going to work because it’s nicer than where he lives. As our standard of living has improved and housing has become so elaborate, work just doesn’t fit into the picture.

Litigation Nation

Some blame Stella Liebeck for the litigation frenzy in this country. Stella was the 79-year-old woman a New Mexico jury awarded $2.9 million after spilling hot McDonald’s coffee in her lap in 1992. She became an icon for an out-of-control tort system, but she was not the cause. The problem began 15 years earlier.

American lawyers couldn’t advertise for over 200 years. That changed with a five to four U.S. Supreme Court decision in 1977.² Justice Lewis Powell wrote in his dissenting opinion, “Some lawyers may gain; others will suffer by the deceit of less scrupulous lawyers. Some members of the public may benefit . . . but the risk is that many others will be victimized.” Justice Powell predicted the future with spine-tingling accuracy. It’s too bad the other five justices didn’t listen. I wonder if he ever looked back and said, “I told you this was going to happen.” Lawyers spent over $311 million on television commercials in 2002. This was a 75 percent increase from 1999. If you look in any Yellow Pages you’ll see a law firm that paid as much as $60,000 to buy a full-page ad. Now the big trend is advertising on the Internet. Type “class-action lawsuit” into your search engine and you’ll find thousands of law firms soliciting plaintiffs.

The problem is bad enough with ambulance chasers who might lack morals but at least stay within the law. Then there’s the problem with those who break the law in order to practice law by paying runners to solicit accident victims. At least they’re only chasing plaintiffs who were involved in legitimate accidents. Even worse are the lawyers who create the accidents. One scam is called swoop and squat, in which a driver with a car full of plaintiffs-to-be pulls in front of the unknowing victim and, slams on the brakes, forcing a rear-end collision. The lawyer then sues the insurance company for whiplash on behalf of the victims.

So how does this affect you? America’s out-of-control tort system raises two worrisome issues for employers. The first issue is how it affects the work ethic. The basic premise of tort law is avoiding personal accountability by assigning blame to others. We’ve gone from “McDonald’s coffee burned me” to “McDonald’s made me fat and I was an innocent victim.” The second issue is that employers are the newest targets for litigation. The victim mentality is now “I lost my job through no fault of my own. I couldn’t help it that I couldn’t get to work on time.” Listen for the following advertisement:

Have you been wrongfully terminated? Call my office today and let us get you the money you’re entitled to. Justice is your right, and we demand it because you deserve it!

Your company has a bull’s-eye painted on it. The bigger your company, the more likely a lawyer will have you in his crosshairs.

Today’s Generation

Many members of today’s generation are undisciplined, have no desire to grow up and accept responsibility, and have been spoiled by overindulgent parents. Each of these affects employees’ behavior and consequently your actions as a supervisor.

Back When Kids Wanted to Be like Grown-Ups

When I was a kid, we couldn’t wait to grow up. Little boys had toy razors and used their dad’s shaving cream to pretend to shave. I was reprimanded on numerous occasions for using my father’s or grandfather’s pen in my coloring books. Fancy pens were for grown-ups, and that’s what I wanted to be. The first time I heard my father being excited to go Christmas shopping was on my twenty-fourth Christmas. Mom asked what they could give me and I suggested a Mont Blanc pen. Dad was overwhelmed with pride. It was the pride a dentist feels when his son graduates dental school and joins his father to practice dentistry. It was the pride an attorney feels when his son graduates law school and joins his father to practice law. I became a real man in my dad’s eyes the day I asked for that pen. It indicated to Dad that I had matured sufficiently to appreciate the finer things in life. Little girls in my generation couldn’t wait to grow up either. They would get into trouble for wearing their mother’s makeup, lipstick, and eventually shoes and clothes. When a little girl was big enough to get her ears pierced like her mom’s, she had arrived.

We were all anxious to graduate high school and leave for college. Then we were anxious to graduate college and start our lives. I took classes the summer between my junior and senior years in college so I could graduate the following spring. I was chomping at the bit to move into the real world. When I received my first American Express card my senior year, I felt validated. I returned the credit card Dad had allowed me to carry in case of an emergency, and proudly announced I no longer needed it. Members of my generation who didn’t attend college also valued independence. The top priority for most was moving out and getting their own apartment. For others, it was getting married and starting a family. No matter which path we chose, we couldn’t wait to take on the world. We valued independence and self-reliance.

Now Grown-Ups Want to Be Kids

Today, there is an ever-growing population of twenty-somethings who readily admit they’re in no hurry to leave home. They value leisure over independence, and are putting off growing up as long as possible. They have been labeled “youthhood,” “adult-lescents,” “thresholders,” and part of the “Peter Pan Syndrome.” The U.S. Census Bureau reported over five million unmarried couples cohabitating in 2000.³ This used to be a thorn in parents’ side. In an ironic twist of fate, many parents of twenty-somethings today wish their kids would move in with their boyfriends or girlfriends. They just want them out of the house.

Those who leave for college aren’t graduating. Lingering has become such a problem that universities are almost to the point of forcing students out. Four-year degrees often take six to eight years. The University of Texas spent $22 million on a program to entice students to graduate in four years. Western Illinois University guarantees freshman their tuition won’t increase as long as they finish in four years. UCLA students face expulsion for not earning a quota of credits each semester. Instead of living in crowded dorms, students today are living in luxury apartments. They’re running up credit card bills for beer and pizza. They’re spending Spring Break in Mexico and Christmas in Europe. In 2002, 19 percent of the people who filed for bankruptcy were college students. As social chairman of my fraternity for two consecutive years, I readily admit that we hauled more than a few kegs. We lived on beer, pizza, and chili dogs for four years. We also lived on campus in military-style dorms, walked to class, and graduated in four years. College was a stepping-stone to adulthood, not a permanent way of life.

Boomerang Kids

Adult-lescents are now moving back in with mom and dad after graduating college. These “boomerang kids” argue that they’re doing it to save money. This sounds good, but it isn’t the case for most. A report from research organization Demos revealed average credit card debt for young adults ages 25 to 34 increased by 55 percent from 1992 to 2001, and 104 percent for ages 18 to 24.⁴ Young adults don’t learn personal responsibility and self-discipline until they’re self-supportive. Having greater disposable income allows them to feed impulsive spending habits and become even more irresponsible. While the statistics don’t indicate how many of these young adults live with their parents, we know it is a huge trend. David Morrison, founder and CEO of market research firm Twentysomething Inc., says that 65 percent of this year’s college graduates plan to move back in with their parents after graduation.⁵ Recent findings published by the American Sociological Association revealed the percentage of men who had finished school, left home, married, become financially independent, and had a child by age 30 was 65 percent in 1960. It was only 31 percent in 2000. The percentage for women fell from 77 percent to 46 percent for the same period.⁶

Another argument some boomerang kids make is that they’re taking time to decide what to do with their lives. They don’t want to “rush into a career they might not like.” I don’t buy this either. Student loan provider Nellie Mae reported that the average undergraduate student loan debt was $18,900 in 2002, a 66 percent increase from 1997.⁷ Young adults with this much debt don’t have the luxury of waiting to decide what they want to do with their lives. I would love to gather a room full of these overgrown adolescents and scream, “You just spent nearly $19,000 deciding what you want to do with your life. It’s too late to pontificate the matter. Now get off your lazy behinds and get a real job!” As soon as the room cleared, I would love to meet with their parents and scream, “Quit enabling your kids to be so irresponsible. Cut the apron strings already!”

I heard a recent college graduate call in to a nationally syndicated financial talk show. He is living at home with his parents and having a hard time paying his student loans. When asked what he was doing with the money from his job, he explained that he had just purchased a big screen television. These young adults are developing deeply ingrained habits of irresponsibility and lack of self-control. These habits are going to be harder to break the longer they wait.

So how does this affect employers? At some point, you’ll be employing these young adults. You’ll have to teach them basic values such as personal responsibility. You’ll also need to look more closely at twenty-something job applicants to determine what life stage they are in. Is this a young adult or an overgrown adolescent still living in the same bedroom he or she lived in at 16? Fast-food restaurants see annual employee turnover rates as high as 200 percent. A substantial part of this turnover is because teenagers fill a high percentage of these positions. They can walk out on impulse if they don’t like being reprimanded. When a person has no financial obligations, employment is not a necessity. When you employ a 28-year-old still living with his parents, you are essentially employing a 28-year-old teenager; employment is not a necessity for him. All other things being equal, I’ll hire a 22-year-old who is self-supportive over a 28-year-old who is mooching off mom and dad.

Overindulgent Parents

Parents may be creating a time bomb with the potential to do more damage to the American work ethic than anything we’ve ever faced. Overindulgent parents are raising materialistic kids who think the world revolves around them. One current trend is called best-friend parenting. According to market research firm Synovate, 43 percent of parents surveyed want to be their kids’ best friend.⁸ The problem is that they’re failing to be parents while trying to be best friends. One mom said she wouldn’t make her child do homework or chores because it made him unhappy. Synovate also found that 40 percent of the parents would buy their kids everything they wanted if finances allowed. In the name of “I want my kids to have what I never had,” parents are inflicting serious damage on their kids. Even adults who have selflessly eschewed their own materialism in the name of being a good parent have failed to see how materialistic they have made their own kids.

My father used to say, “I don’t have to spank Glenn often. But when I do, I only have to do it once.” When he pulled out his belt, I always got the “This is going to hurt me more than it’s going to hurt you” speech. I often wanted to say, “Well, alright then. Let’s trade places and we’ll both be happier,” but thought better of it since he was holding the belt. I resented it at the time, but appreciate it today. Dad set clear boundaries. When I violated them, I was punished. As a result, I learned to respect the boundaries. He fulfilled his duty as a parent. Too many parents today are guilty of dereliction of duty.

Parenting has gone from one extreme to the other. There was a great to-do about overcontrolling parents in the 1990s. Many of us know adults who grew up with overcontrolling parents and see the results. These individuals still relinquish control to parents who tell them when to come for Christmas, where to live, who to date, who to marry, where to work, and even what to wear. While this isn’t healthy, it’s not a disaster for the manager who employs them. These individuals recognize authority figures and respect boundaries. Children of overindulgent parents don’t recognize authority figures or respect boundaries.

So why is it so important to teach kids boundaries? Let’s look at a common misperception of adults regarding money. Most people think winning the lottery would be their key to financial independence, but it’s actually the door to financial ruin. Lottery winners have a higher rate of bankruptcy and divorce than the general population. Winning the lottery doesn’t make limits disappear; it just makes them harder to see until it’s too late. Having a $10 million windfall seems like unlimited wealth to someone who makes $20,000 a year. However, it’s not unlimited. The limit is $10 million. When someone is used to bringing home less than $400 a week, the limit is clear because it’s so close. When it’s so far away, we forget, deny, or procrastinate in dealing with the fact that we will inevitably have to pay the piper someday. The same is true with the child of overindulgent parents. When a child never hears no, it’s natural for him to believe there’s no limit. Mom and dad are a blank checkbook. No matter how many times parents tell a child they can’t afford the new Sony Play Station, the child believes they can. When parents don’t set limits or define boundaries, children don’t learn to delay gratification or impulse control. These kids are now entering the workforce. Their parents are already in the workforce. Can you imagine trying to set boundaries with adults who don’t think it’s necessary to set boundaries with their own children?

A Pill-Popping Nation

In his best-selling book, Shut Up, Stop Whining, and Get a Life, Larry Winget writes, “People are becoming more and more tolerant of whiners. It is so commonplace we hardly notice it any more.”⁹ He’s right. We became a Jerry Springer